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Latino actors should stop lending their names to dumb, racist films

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When it comes to stereotyping Latino culture — especially in a negative manner — Americans do a phenomenal job all their own. So it might be a good idea to ask prominent Latino actors not to help them out.

Case in point, Salma Hayek was booked to voice a character called “Teresa del Taco” in Sausage Party, an animated movie. Written by Seth Rogen & his buddies, does this “Teresa del Taco” — taco being slang for vagina here in America, in case you didn’t know — have anything to do with Teresa, the late ’80s telenovela Salma once starred in? Unfortunately, no.

“Teresa del Taco,” an animated character in Sausage Party.

But it does have everything to do with playing into a stereotype, because what’s the one thing that Americans know about Mexicans? That they eat tacos, of course.

Plus, where’s the self-respect? At this point in her career, being an Oscar-nominated actress and all, Hayek should really be above this simple — not to mention racist — humor. I understand why she had to make a Mexican caricature of herself in films like Fools Rush In [1997]. Back in the ’90s, Salma was still newcomer in Hollywood, and had little clout.  She probably had to accept whatever role came her way, or risk being relegated to the Televisa ghetto.

But since she got herself out of that predicament, thanks to her work in Frida, among other films, why do a dumb bro comedy? I really doubt she needs the money, and the best part about achieving success in any given profession — Hayek is a huge star, let’s not kid ourselves — is not having to play the fool for anybody but yourself.

Maybe Salma feels it’s okay to participate in these low-brow projects because she’s also pursuing more substantial, captivating work, such as starring in Septembers in Shiraz, a serious, emotionally-draining film which, according to IMDB, is “the story of a prosperous Jewish family who abandon everything before they are consumed by the passions of revolutionaries.”

In Septembers in Shiraz, Hayek plays Farnez, a Middle Eastern woman who speaks with both a Middle Eastern and a Mexican accent, apparently:

Septembers in Shiraz may not land Salma an Academy Award, or maker her a millions of dollars, but at least her character doesn’t lend Mexican culture to silly bro ridicule.

Keep it together, Duchess of Coatzacoalcos.

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María Rubio was so good as Catalina Creel, an iconic telenovela villain, the role ruined her career

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According to sources on Twitter, and also TvNotas, the holy bible of Mexican gossip, María Rubio, the legendary actress best known for her role as Catalina Creel de Larios in Cuna de lobos, has passed away. She was 83 years old.

Thanks to her role as Soraya Montenegro in María la del Barrio, Itati Cantoral has been dominating the internet with an insane amount of memes, gifs, and even a House of Cards promo special. Itati blew up in the mid ’90s, when older millennials were still teens, and she’s that generation’s go-to character when it comes to Mexican telenovela villains.

Yes, Cantoral was great as Soraya, but the top dog in the telenovela villain game was — and has always been — María Rubio. The Tijuana-born actress was so good in Cuna de lobos that, according to an interview she did with Cristina Saralegui, the role ruined her career:

“[Catalina Creel] was a difficult, beloved character. I enjoyed playing her, but she also hurt me a lot. People completely forgot about María Rubio and now it seems that, after 40 years of being an actress, I’ve only done Catalina Creel.”

Catalina, a murderous matriarch, was known for having some of the best one-liners in telenovela history. But in the same interview with Saralegui, which was filmed over 20 years ago, María proved to be just as cunning and smart as her infamous character, but also incredibly funny:

“[Although I played a villain], I’ve received nothing but compliments, love, and admiration. Never aggression. I think viewers do attack the bad ones — bad actresses, that is.”

If you understand Spanish, check out the hilarious interview below. Watch María viciously own everyone in a panel of full of young telenovela villains:

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Traumatic advice from aunt Rosa: “Don’t torture your Care Bear, Mijo. Or else.”

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I was 6 years old when I yelled at Tugs, my Care Bear. I put him in time-out for not agreeing to the rules of an imaginary game I had just created.

I built a little time-out fortress for him to stay in while I played with my other toys. Coincidentally my tía Rosa was visiting that day. I urged her to see all my toys when she came into the house. I also explained to her that Tugs was in time-out, to which she replied in shock, “Mijo, mira, You have to be nice to your toys.”

I replied, “Tía, I am nice to my toys, but I’m teaching him a lesson.”

She contested nervously, “No, Mijo, you have to be nice to your toys or they might not be nice to you.”

I wasn’t following her logic.

Mijo, if you’re not nice to your toys, then at night time they might wake up and crawl into your bed to cut your toes with tiny razors,” she said slowly while staring at my imprisoned Care Bear.

“What?!” I whispered to her while looking at Tugs from the corner of my eye.

“Yes, your toys might do very bad things to you if you don’t treat them good.”

I stared at her in disbelief.

She stood up and walked towards the doorway.

Mijo, I brought you some tortillas. Come in the kitchen and let’s warm them up,” Rosa said casually.

From then on, Tugs sat on a tufted pillow on my dresser while I slept in velcro shoes for the next year. Growing up in my Mexican-American family meant that everything was possibly alive and watching you.


Felix III – Journeys the cosmos via Holy Hands Vol. 2. Rents a one-bedroom on Neptune. IG: @Futurefelix / Twitter: @thefuturefelix


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